SCAM AND FRAUD ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PLEASE BE INFORMED THAT WE, BOB PETERSON OR ANY MEMBER OF OUR FAMILY, IS "NOT" RENTING OR LEASING ANY APARTMENTS IN AMERICA, INCLUDING THE STATE OF NEW YORK AND WE ARE "NOT" COLLECTING ANY MONEY FOR SUCH THINGS. SOMEONE HAS BEEN IMPERSONATING BOB AND OPENING FAKE EMAIL ACCOUNTS WITH OUR INFORMATION. THEY ARE USING THIS BLOG AS PROOF OF THEIR IDENTITY, SENDING PEOPLE EMAILS AND USING CRAIGS LIST. PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT FALL VICTIM TO THIS SCAM!!! I CONTACTED THE ATTORNEY GENERAL'S OFFICE TODAY. IF YOU ARE BEING TARGETED WITH THIS SCAM, PLEASE REPORT IT IMMEDIATELY TO YOUR LOCAL ATTORNEY GENERAL'S OFFICE AS WELL AS TO CRAIG'S LIST.

Embrace His Grace

Since September, I am no longer a home school mom. Before now, my time was filled with being behind on this and being behind on that. It was a constant toss up of priorities. Are we nearly out of underwear yet? If not, laundry can wait. Does someone need something from me to meet a personal deadline? If so, top of the list. Do we have bread for lunch and a plan for supper? Check. During my prayer time, did God prompt me with someone in particular to reach out to? Again, top of the list. Do we still have cups to drink out of and plates to eat off of? Do the dishes later. Oh, wait! Is school ready and planned for the day? Check. It was a constant balancing act in which no job ever seemed 'done.' Gone were the days of scrap-booking, reading a leisure book or simple relaxation. I never felt like I was done enough to ever truly enjoy things like that for myself. The only relaxation time was in the evening with whatever the family decided to do. Time with friends was reduced mostly to those whom God had put on my heart for the day or week. Instead, I was simply Mom, Wife, Secretary/Treasurer for Global Outreach, Home school Teacher, Taxi Driver, etc. It is amazing how removing just 'one' of those titles freed up some of my time. That having been said, I am still in this transitionary state. I have committed to not say 'yes' to anything new until I have my long to do list reduced, at least some. Many things have been neglected, at home especially, for far too long. To be honest, operating in this mode for literally years now has taken its toll on me. Slowing down recently has become my life-line. I just didn't realize it until God dumped it in my lap, so to speak, when He provided for our youngest child to attend a local expat school this year, along with the other two boys in boarding school and our daughter in college. When we went to some training for counseling and member care recently, it became very apparent my own lack of self-care. Here I was concerned for how to help everyone else care well for themselves, but I had neglected my own. Then this week I got sick, some kind of stomach bug. It slowed me down even further. As we are anticipating a trip to South Africa in just about a week's time, my thoughts began to shift to what needs to be done for that. But suddenly I no longer 'felt' like doing anything. With Bob not feeling up to par (having side effects from the high medication dosage he is on for anti-arrhythmia), that left no one but me to do things around the house or even run errands and do taxi rides for Josiah. I believe God is trying to get my attention and perhaps has been for some time now. How do I prioritize my time? Is it by the tyranny of the urgent? Is it merely by what I 'feel' like doing? Is it actually other people's priorities apart from my own? Or is it His priorities that He is calling me to? The last few years, I have asked God to give me a catch phrase to hang onto for the year, a sort of theme, if you will. This year's theme has been "Extend Grace." In extending grace, I thought He wanted me to concentrate on others. And I believe He did, but now I also see Him calling me to extend grace to myself. That isn't as easy as it might seem. For if you are like me, you are hardest on yourself. Extend grace. Yes. Receive His grace fully. Wow. Extend, receive, and absorb. I believe this is His answer for me. How can I make it through this new transition of no longer being a home school mom and reforming my schedule/priorities? Embrace His grace. Absorb it. I see that now. By embracing His grace fully I will finally be able to find His priorities and move forward well enough to extend grace to others ... just as I should have been doing all along.

The "Coke"

Living in a foreign country whose official language is English, you might think that I wouldn't have any problems communicating. However, it was immediately apparent that Ugandans often struggled to hear and understand my American English 'accent.' It wasn't long before I would 'adjust' my accent, somewhat unconsciously, to more of a "Ugandan" English accent in order to have successful communication with my Ugandan friends. After living here for over six years, you would think that I would have this Ugandan English accent "down." Well, I don't know if that will ever really happen. Just last week, I received a telephone call from a Ugandan friend who was in need of money. She wanted to know if I would buy her 'coke,' at least that's what I "thought" I heard. I was confused. How would buying a Coca-cola (Coke) from her help her out with money? I continued to attempt to clarify what she wanted to sell me. After some frustration on both of our parts, I told her I would call her back. I went to get another Ugandan friend who could speak with her in Lugandan, if needed, to clarify what she needed me to buy. (It is not unusual for Ugandans to approach multiple friends when they are in need of money. It is part of the 'community' orientation here in this society. Each one contributes what they can toward the need and in turn, when they are in need, they may ask the same individual for a contribution in return. My friend wasn't looking for a hand-out either. She wanted to sell me something and I often buy such things whether I need them or not in order to help them out.) My two friends talked and had quite a good laugh at this mzungu (white man/woman). She didn't want to sell me a coke, but a cock (rooster)! Here in Uganda, a short 'o' vowel sound often sounds more like a long 'o' vowel sound and I wasn't applying my knowledge of the Ugandan accent very well. It was a good reminder that I am still learning and probably will never stop learning how to communicate well here. My friend sold me her cock for an inflated price (as expected) and I shared him with another friend that we know who is struggling to make ends meet. Community - so glad to be a part of it. Ugandan English accent - will I ever learn?

In the Ninth Hour

When I look back on the many times God has been faithful to provide and answer prayers so clearly and fully, I shake my head. So many times, He answers our prayers in the 'ninth hour,' so to speak. This is yet another one of those times. I can't help but think that He answers in the ninth hour only for my benefit as I "still" seem to struggle with patience in my heart even after all these years of His incredible faithfulness and goodness. Back in April this year, Jon was accepted into Rift Valley Academy, the American boarding school in Kenya where both Janae and Josh have and are attending. It is an incredible school and now all of our children have a deep desire to go there for some, if not all, of their high school years. Even though we realized that finding the money to send Jon there would be a huge step of faith, we enrolled him. Just a few weeks ago, our van sold which will help provide for his tuition there (despite the fact that we were totally honest about all of the mechanical issues that the van continues to have). This was a huge praise for our family. It was also a confirmation that God did indeed want Jon to attend this fall at RVA as a ninth grader. Enter my heart for Josiah and Josiah's heart ... Josiah has never been alone without one or more of his older siblings. Until just this year, he had never even slept in his own room before. Pretty much everything and everywhere he has gone all of his life has included at least one of his siblings -- even visits to friend's houses. Josiah began to grieve the loss of his sibling, Jon, almost immediately. It was tough for him to think about. It didn't help that he knew this was a possibility. The reality of it hit hard. That set both Josiah and myself to praying and seeking God for the opportunity for him to go to school locally. There are two really good options nowadays (there didn't used to be) for an eighth grader MK here in/near Jinja. I was able to get him accepted for a Friday day-only option, but this still left him homeschooling alone for four days of the week. Now if you know Josiah, he needs people. He was born to need to be around people even more than any of the rest of the Bob Peterson family. I had quite a list of reasons that I told God why Josiah should be allowed to go to school this year (as if God needed me to point any of them out). Now in the process of this praying, I was convicted that I need not "advertise" that I was willing to work part-time at either of the schools that could possibly take Josiah in order to hopefully reduce tuition to a place where we could afford it. (In a moment of weakness one day, I did email one school director but interestingly enough, she never read it.) Instead, we asked God to speak clearly. We would leave it up to Him. I would not approach either of the schools with a firm offer to give my services. If I was supposed to work part-time (full-time would be impossible as I could not continue to do ministry), then the leader(s) of the school would approach me and ask me to work part-time for them in some capacity. Otherwise, we would ask that God provide the funds in totality. Either of these two scenarios would answer our prayer specifically. If neither of these options occurred, then we would know that Josiah would be homeschooling. While the notion that our homeschooling era might be ending was a bit alarming to swallow, I believed in my heart that this was the case. We further decided earlier this week that if nothing happens before this weekend (like before today), then we would know that homeschooling is His answer to our prayers (again, not something that we were 'advertising'). As I write this, it is Saturday morning. Yesterday evening, I received a phone call. An anonymous donation was being made on our behalf specifically for Josiah to be able to attend one of the MK schools here locally and it was the entire amount needed. Did you hear that? It was just last night ... yes, the ninth hour! Today we would have made a decision to homeschool ... BUT ... God!!! Now Josiah will be attending an MK/Expat School that only goes through the eighth grade (his current grade) and is just 20 minutes away. There was another very good option 45 minutes away, but we believe in our hearts that this is the place where Josiah will attend. I talked with the administrator yesterday and she confirmed that Josiah would be accepted. Not only was he being accepted but she already had books for an eighth grader and a new desk because someone else for that same grade had cancelled!!! Only God could have orchestrated this and in His perfect timing. Why do I continue to have an impatient heart? I am still so weak and falter in my faith. I don't know if I will ever be patient in the way that God would want me to be. All I know is that He is a faithful God and He will never change. How good He is and how deeply He cares for our concerns. He is always working whether we see it or not. And I am filled with gratefulness, especially this morning ... in the ninth hour!!!

Dung Beetles

Okay, so it has been a while since I have updated the blog. Some of you may not be aware that our ministry focus has changed some. I am still working part time with SHIM (Shepherd’s Heart International Ministry) working in the islands, but we also have some different responsibilities. The home office (Global Outreach Int’l) asked me to be the Africa Regional Director. This means that Michelle and I are doing missionary care for our GOI missionaries working in Africa. I must admit that we have some doubts as to our abilities and resources to do the job well, but we believe that God has called us to follow Him in this. We had been doing some of this with missionaries in Uganda for a while now, but this March would be the first time we would be reaching out beyond to other African countries. The home office requested that we have a family from a different country come and stay with us for a few weeks so we could encourage them and help sort out some things. Ready or not, here we go! I spent the week before the family arrived out on the islands doing Pastoral training. The training went well but was tiring. While SHIM works hard to take care of its trainers, the conditions are not exactly what this old body is used to, and I don’t get much sleep. The last day on the island, I take a chair and sit, spending some time in the Word and meditation. I watch the water and the birds soaring above, but then I notice a dung beetle heading towards me, rolling its ball of dung. This is not an easy task as there are so many obstacles, grass and sticks, but with determination and hard work the beetle keeps the ball rolling. I look to where the beetle had come from and see a fresh pile of dung. I go to investigate. (Yes, I know you are thinking how fascinating missionary life sounds.) I see that there are about thirty dung beetles swarming the pile, each seeking its own piece of the prize. I observe some of the beetles have secured their ball of treasure and are busily rolling it away. At first I think some are working in tandem but then I realize they are actually fighting over the same ball. The bigger beetle was rolling the ball forward while the smaller one tried to roll the other direction; but all in vain, as no matter how hard it worked it just kept getting pushed backwards. As I observed the beetles, I kept feeling I should be gaining some insight from it all but failed to find any deep meaning in this pile of dung. The next morning we took our 4 ½ hour boat ride, in the hot Africa sun, back to Jinja. When I got back, I was exhausted with my energy reserve on empty. Immediately a cold jumped me, and within a day’s time, both my head and my chest were congested. I have a history with pneumonia and by the end of the second day, my wheezing, hacking, difficulty breathing and fever told me I was headed that direction. I was dismayed at the suddenness of it all and the fact that this was also the day the missionary family came to stay with us. I had not been sure how we were going to best help this family but being laid out in bed had not been a part of my plan. Even with medication, recovery went slow. For the two weeks, they were with us and I was lucky to be able to spend one hour a day talking with them. Michelle did a wonderful job taking care of both our families. We did make it through a study and had some good talks, (and the family said the time had been good for them) but I couldn’t help feeling far from successful. I finally started feeling better the day the family headed back home. With the sickness being so sudden at just the wrong time to interfere with our efforts, I couldn’t help but feel Satan’s hand was in it. For the next few days I felt progressively better; which was good for in just a few weeks we planned to go to Ethiopia to get to know and encourage our missionaries there. I wanted to be strong for that. Then the pneumonia rebounded and I was also struck by malaria. As I lay there, shaking violently with fever, I felt anything but strong. It was also along this time that some thieves tried to break into our home, we had a vehicle break down, and we took some financial hits, along with a number of other stressors. I say this not to try to gain your sympathy but to show how weak I felt in the face of the challenges around me. I wanted to be strong and in control, but that was not an option open to me. God then brought me back to the day I sat and watched the birds and the dung beetles. I, like the beetles, had been trying by determination and persistence to overcome any obstacle and keep the ball rolling to achieve my goal. But God helped me to see, even if I succeeded, I still would only have gained a ball of dung. In actuality, I had been more like the small beetle, fighting opponents stronger than myself, trying hard but only going backwards. I felt God saying, “Stop fighting, and stop relying on your strength for it is only an illusion.” I don’t know how much the missionary family that came to stay with us got out of their visit, but I know I learned a couple of things. First off, there is definitely a need for the work God has called us to do. There are a lot of missionary families out there who need someone to care about them and the struggles they face. Secondly, if we are going to be of any help to anyone, it will not come out of our wisdom and strength. Instead, it will come out of an acceptance of our weakness and knowing only by the grace of God can we be of any use. Once again, I am slowly recovering from my sickness and we have a week before we are to head to Ethiopia. There are still an awful lot of questions flickering around within me, but I am trying to learn to trust, to lean upon, to depend more upon my weakness than my strength. I do ask for your prayers as we go forward. I am not really sure what I should be asking you to pray for, so I will leave that to you and the Spirit. But I know for sure, we can use all the prayer we can get. God is good, all the time, even in our weakness.

Extend Grace

As I get older, I have discovered that I don't multi-task quite as well as I once did. Because of this, the last few years I have asked God to give me a short phrase as I look ahead to a new year. In 2015, He gave me, "Embrace the Place." This was interesting to me because of the fact that He changed our focus midstream; yet, I am convinced that He knew I needed this phrase. No matter what happened last year, I needed to adapt and focus on the place at that very moment. The year was full of different situations and circumstances. I needed to hear that phrase over and over as each one occurred. This coming year for 2016, He has given me the words "Extend Grace." I do not fully know what He intends with this phrase yet. But one thing I am fully convinced of. No matter who I encounter or what circumstance He brings my way, I need to focus on this one thing more than anything else. May He show me clearly just how He wants me to extend grace to others, whether it is our new home or out in the community as I go to and fro. And may I glorify Him as I do indeed extend "His" grace!!!

"THE" House ... Answer to Prayer!

On Friday, December 11th, we were headed to Walukuba which is only 5-10 minutes away from Jinja town. Knowing that Ruthie had already looked at all the houses in the area and coupled with the fact that there just wasn't much new to see, we were not expecting to see much. The broker had one new listing this week and he thought perhaps this one might work, even though it didn't have a garage. As we drove through different neighborhoods, suddenly the houses seemed a bit nicer. I had just stuck my hand out the window and pointed at this one house, saying, "Hey, that one is cool!" when the broker's car in front of us stopped. He pointed at the very same house! Could it be? Surely I had misunderstood him to mean the very same house I had just pointed out to Bob, but I hadn't. The thing that caught my eye from the street was a large, round front porch covering the central part of the house. Beautiful, I thought! As we entered the house and moved from room to room, I could almost instantly picture our furniture in each place. The kitchen was large enough for our big range/oven. Not only was there a bath tub, but the tub has a seat contoured into it. There is a linen closet in the hallway. The boys' quarters is roomy enough for our stuff and Bob's tools. The dining room is large enough for our 12 person dining room table. Four bedrooms. Four bathrooms. A small window between the kitchen and dining room to pass food through. I am still amazed at all the features that this house has for us!!! Not only did God answer our prayer for a BIG house and LITTLE money, He gave us some neat extras to enjoy!!! I can hardly wait to move in and begin enjoying the new residence that He has provided for us. Today we signed a temporary contract. Tomorrow we sign the final agreement. The deal is made. The work to repair needed things to prepare the house for us will begin in just a couple of days or so. The owner invites us to come and check on the house from time to time while it is in progress. God is so gracious to us! This house was not available earlier. It is as if God was telling us to wait, because this house was not quite ready for us to come see it. What a wonderful surprise to not only see a great house that we fell in love with, but that the landlord was agreeable with our budget and needs. All glory and praise and honor to Him who does abundantly beyond all we could ever ask or seek!!!

BIG house, LITTLE money

Just under five weeks to go before we have to be in our own new place, somewhere in the Jinja area. That “seems” like a lot of time … but somehow today, it doesn’t feel like enough. We have no house to move into. Ruthie Howard, who lives with us when she is not on the island working with SHIM, looked diligently for us at house after house in anticipation of our arrival. The search was on. “Our” idea was that we would secure the house before we arrived, even doing the contract by email and sending the money by MoneyGram or Western Union to secure the deal. That would make life so much easier for us when we arrived, right?!! That way we would have ample time to pack up and move our things. As is often the case, God obviously has other plans. We have asked Him specifically for a BIG house and LITTLE money (essentially, that means a 4 bedroom house with a garage and a separate boys’ quarters for $500 or less – difficult to find in Jinja town.) Any houses that seemed to fit our needs were either too expensive or faded quickly away to another’s fair find. We believe that He has “the” house for us and we only need to find it. He has done just that for us before. Perhaps I need reminding!!! It was 1997. Bob was pastoring a circuit of three small churches in Wytheville, Virginia. He had graduated with his M.Div. degree the year before. We were expecting our first child when the phone call came. My mom informed me that my sister-in-law’s cancer was back, not only back but much worse. Bob wasn’t home at the time, but I instantly knew in my heart, “It was time to go home.” Home meant moving back to Oregon. By the time Bob came home and I shared with him about the phone call, he instantly responded, “It’s time to go home, isn’t it?” It was clear. We knew what we needed to do. Because we knew that churches looking for a pastor might be few and far between, we asked God to find us a church within 90 minutes to 2 hours away from my brother and his family. We wanted to be available for whatever they might need but thought, realistically, we probably wouldn’t be able to locate any closer than that. (Oh, my, what a faith walk we had yet to walk …) To make a long story short, in our search for a new home (unbeknownst to us), my brother was also searching for a new home, one that would be in the small town of Dufur where their children could get into a good school and be able to walk there daily from home. God not only took us to a new home two blocks away from my brother, we could even see his house from our front living room window. On top of that, it was cheaper for us to rent a truck for 7 days than it was for 5 days. My brother used our moving truck for the last two days to move his things! God is sooo good!!! It is good to remember. Ephesians 3:20-21 was forever engrained in my brain. Now if only I can “feel” it the same way that my brain, oh, so forever knows!!! Because I KNOW that He has “the” place for us and will reveal it in His time and in His way!!! “Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.”

Northwest School of Missions

This furlough I have had the opportunity to be a part of the Northwest School of Missions. It is a program where a few missionaries (this year there were four) are selected to travel around the northwest and speak at various Christian churches that choose to participate. It involved about a month of traveling and speaking. I had the opportunity to share at 20 different churches across the northwest. Michelle and the boys did not travel with me, so they could do homeschool. While it was a long and tiring month, it did allow me to meet a lot of very nice people. While I did share about our work in Uganda, my main focus was on the events of our last year and the lessons God has taught us, especially about God’s desire for us to learn to walk with Him and put our trust in Him. The message looked at the 23rd Psalm and its teaching on what it means to follow God. This was the message God had put upon my heart to share. After giving this message a number of times, I was glad Michelle and the kids did not have to travel with me and hear me give the same message over and over. I was even becoming tired of hearing myself give the message. I tried not doing the message part a couple of times. At one church I felt short on time so I decided to just talk about our work, but a fellow kept interrupting me to ask why we were working in Africa. I realized that God was not allowing me to skip the message He had given me, so I went ahead and shared the message part about following God. Another time I asked God in my devotion time to give me a different message to give. I then went to the next passage of scripture I was to read and found it to be the 23rd Psalm. It was clear I was to stay with the message He had given me. The message part made my presentation a little long, but I think it was more beneficial to those hearing than just hearing about us. God seemed to speak through the stories of our struggles to many people who were dealing with difficulties of their own. At one location before my presentation I overheard a phone conversation in which a man was saying he was not going to come to hear me speak as he was too tired. This did not overly bother me as I did not assume that everyone needed to come hear me. I always figured God could motivate the people who needed to hear. But in this case, I felt God prompt me to pray for this man to come as he needed to be there. I gave the presentation and afterwards a man came up and told me the message had especially touched him as he had been going through some very difficult times lately and had been discouraged. He said he had not planned to come as he had been very tired, but then had felt powerfully moved that he needed to be there. He was the very man I had prayed for. It was not easy being away from the family for so long to do the School of Missions, but I thank God for the opportunity, and pray for His blessings on the people I have met.

My Heart - An Update (by Bob)

It has been a while since I have up dated how things are going. In May we did go down to South Africa for my heart surgery. We had some run around with the insurance that left us in limbo for a few days but the surgery was done and it went fine. The surgery was what is called a “Heart Ablation.” They go in through veins in the lower abdomen/groin area and use lasers to cut areas in the heart which heals with scar tissue to interrupt or silence the nerves that send the wrong signals. That is about as technical as I get. They use a thingamabob to fix the whatchamacallit in my heart. We rested a couple of days and then made the trip back to Uganda. This involved having to run through an airport to make connections, after which my heart went out of rhythm again. We had been told that there was a 70% chance the surgery would fix the problem, and we were afraid I was in the 30% that didn’t work. But with the help of some prayer, my heart went back into rhythm. Praise God! After a visit to my cardiologist in Nairobi, we were told that this was pretty common right after surgery. The heart needed time to heal from the surgery. He told me I just needed to rest for a month and then we would see. It has now been about five months after the surgery and my heart has been doing well, so we are very hopeful that the heart will now behave itself so we can continue on in the work God has called us. I would ask for your prayers for not only for my continued health but for Michelle’s bone spur in her neck as it continues to cause her pain and discomfort.

Answered Prayers!

I thought I would share a picture of the vehicle God provided. It was a vehicle John Fulks (a good missionary friend of ours) owned. John had moved to work in Kenya and could not license the vehicle in Kenya. The vehicle had belonged to Rebecca Fulks' father before he passed away and was dear to them, but they had to keep taking it back to Uganda every few months to keep it legal. By selling it to us, they could in a sense keep the car in their missionary family. By God working it out as He did, He was able to not only bless us but the Fulks' family as well. We are so grateful to God and to the generosity of one of our supporters that made it possible!!! We will be heading to Kenya for one last outing with our daughter Janae before she will be heading back to the states for college. As soon as we get back to Uganda, Michelle and I will be flying down to South Africa where I will have an appointment with the doctor who will hopefully be performing the surgery on my heart. So far nothing has been set except for my initial appointment. We don’t know what to expect after that or how long we will need to be down there. Fortunately, we are blessed to have Ruth Howard as an adopted part of our family (at least we claim her whether she claims us or not). She is a true blessing and will be hanging out with our boys while we are gone! We thank you all for your prayers and we would continue to ask to keep us in them. God bless you!

God Not Only Has This But He Gets ALL the Glory!!! (Amazed and truly overwhelmed with gratefulness)

Okay, so the last few weeks have been a bit of a rollercoaster. Well, actually it has been the last few months, but I digress. After my heart went into arrhythmia and then as the pastors were praying for me the heart returned to normal pattern, we went ahead and flew to Nairobi to see my doctor. I had been anticipating making the trip with my heart in arrhythmia. In fact, I had been nervous about making it there. So flying there, feeling normal, felt almost like a vacation. We went to the doctor who gave me the all-clear although we had to hang around a couple of days to complete his tests. We consulted with him as to my options. With my heart going out of rhythm with increasing frequency (this time within only three months) I was not sure we could stay in Uganda. I really felt God had brought my heart back into rhythm before we made this last trip because I had nearly not survived the one before. I did not think it was wise to expect miracles every time. I asked the doctor what were my options in dealing with this. He said I basically had two. I could just live with the condition as it continued to get worse, (for me that meant leaving the field) or I could have an operation called an ablation where they go in to the heart and kill the senders that are causing the problem. This surgery is not guaranteed to work and has its risks but was my only other option (although has a high success rate and minimal recovery period if successful). The only place in Africa the surgery could be done is in South Africa. Other than that, we would need to go back to the states to have it done. We used the time we were in Nairobi to go see Josh and Janae. It was so good to see them. As we were there a missionary friend of ours, who is now serving there, came up to us and said that he felt God was directing him to offer his car for us to buy. It was a very nice car, but they couldn’t license it there in Kenya and they didn’t really need it that bad. The car is a Landcruiser which is a good vehicle to have in Africa, but it is not one we have considered because it is worth more than we would normally consider. I told my friend that we would pray about it and asked him to pray about a price. Neither Michelle nor I felt we could afford the car, as at that point we had no money, but as I believe this was something God was going to show His hand in, if God provided the price to our friend, and He wanted us to have the car, then He would be the One to provide the money. As I was feeling mostly normal, we decided to take the bus back. The trip was long, and although it went fine, as it was the seventh trip on the bus I had made in about as many months, I was getting really tired of riding that bus. We got back to find our van had been worked on and although it would still need a new engine and was only really good for getting back and forth to town, it was at least running. Our friend in Kenya informed us of the price he was feeling lead to. It was not an extravagant price for the car but was more than we would normally consider. If we were to get that car it could only be God. We found there were other options open for cars available. They were not as nice as the car in Kenya but they were less expensive. We might have been tempted to go with one of the cheaper cars, but in truth, we didn’t have any money at that point for a new vehicle. As we could at least get around a bit with the van, we decided to wait until the first of May, and then see what money God had provided. The amount God provided would direct us to what vehicle to look at. A lot of people had good advice as to what we should do, but I would tell them that with this, we really needed to wait on God and see what He wanted us to do. (We so much enjoy waiting. Okay, you probably couldn’t hear my sarcastic tone there but you get the idea.} Waiting until May seemed a bit long but as we did not intend to ask anyone for the money we didn’t know how long it would take to get the money needed. We wanted to give God time. Yes, this was our lack of faith showing, but I am only human. Anyway, we would wait till May. Only God had other ideas. No sooner had we made that decision than the van broke down again with the same problems as before. Arrrrrrgh!!! At about this same time, Michelle began having medical problems of her own. She experienced parts of her body on her left side would go numb for hours while she was having pain in other areas and then the numbness settled in to stay. The immediate concern was she was having some mini-strokes. After seeing four doctors and having many tests it was determined that she had some bone spurs in her neck which were pinching her nerves. (Discovered after about two and a half weeks’ time.) She has been prescribed some exercises to help and will eventually need surgery but that will wait as long as possible as it is rather risky. With the van being out of action, we were needed to use the bodas (motorcycle taxis) for transportation. Going down our bumpy roads on the back of a motorcycle was not doing Michelle’s neck any good so we decided that we would move our deadline up to the start of April and ask if anyone had a car would could borrow. Even in the midst of our difficulties, God was still showing His hand. Here we saw it in the support of God’s people. One Christian friend helped us get the van to run again, others offered their cars for us to use. We also saw some money come in for the vehicle. It was not enough to buy a car but it was enough to show us God was working. God also worked it out so the insurance would cover my surgery. Arrangements are being made for me to go to South Africa in May. As we approached the end of March, we were wondering what God would do about the money for the car. We didn’t know of any more money that had come in but still felt God would provide. Then we got word today that one of our faithful supporters had felt God put on their heart to help us buy the car from the missionary in Kenya. We didn’t even know how they knew we thinking about that car, but through them not only will we be blessed with a vehicle better than we had hoped but the missionary in Kenya will be blessed as well. We are so thankful. But the best part of it is that God has shown how He can take care of those who trust in Him!!! These last few months have indeed been a bit of a rollercoaster and for us we know it is not over. We still have health issues for both Michelle and me, as well as preparing for furlough and I’m sure things I have no idea of yet. But I hope you hear in this our adventure - God is good, and He is there for us even when we can’t see Him, and even when it feels like the world is conspiring against us. This is not our home and we are not promised that things will always be nice here, but we are promised that our God will never leave nor forsake us. To God be the glory in all things great and small!!!

A Trip Back to Nairobi Hospital

Sometimes it is hard to understand what God is doing but He is there. This morning I woke up and my heart was not beating in a regular rhythm. It was not the first time. In fact, it had happened only three months previous. It meant that we would once again need to make a trip to Nairobi for a cardio inversion. The last time we had taken the bus and by the end I was feeling my heart might go into a full heart attack with chest pains and tightness. This time we will fly. It would still take a number of hours and cost us more but I did not think I could make another bus trip in the same condition. With this happening so soon again, it brought up serious questions about my ability to stay on the mission field. We would need to talk to the doctor about possible solutions. With the heart being out of rhythm, it leaves me feeling weak and light headed. I lay in bed and prayed to God, “God, why? We are trying to live by faith. We have tried to surrender to You the vehicle problems and trust You will take care of us, and not only have we not seen any answers to that prayer, now we have this. Am I being punished for something?” We began making arrangements for the trip. Different friends jumped forward to help. Their care means more than I can say. We got a flight to go out tonight. I was feeling concerned about the trip. There would first need to be a road trip of about four hours just to get to the airport . Then I would need to deal with all the check in procedures. I had heard that if the airline knew I was having some heart issues they would not let me on, so that meant I could not use a wheelchair. I would have to get around on my own power as best I could. The pastors, who were my students, came and asked if they could pray for me. I readily accepted. Prayer is always a good thing and you never know what God might do. The pastors came in and said they would pray for God’s healing and ask for a miracle in whatever way God might choose to do. I knew that these men believed that God could still do miracles and I did, too. As they were praying over me I joined them in asking for God to do a miracle in me. Then as they continued to pray, I checked my pulse and found that it was back in normal rhythm. Once before my heart had gone back in to normal rhythm on its own but all the other times the heart had needed to be shocked, and I knew this time the heart did not do this on its own. God had restored the rhythm! I told the pastors about my heart being back in rhythm after they had stopped praying and thanked them and God. Our plane tickets were already bought and I knew the doctor would want to see me anyway so we will still fly to Nairobi. It will probably cost us about $1,000.00 but maybe the doctor will find that my heart is completely healed or we will start moving forward on what needs to happen to get this issue dealt with. I still don’t know why God has allowed this all to happen but it is clear that His hand is in this situation. For now, that will need to be enough.

Watching and Waiting

I look down and see that my sandals are coming apart. I have just arrived home after walking home from church, about an hour’s long dusty trek in the hot sun. I’m sure for some missionaries this would be nothing, but for this one, well let’s just say, I am glad to be home. Being without a vehicle for the last four weeks has not been terrible, but it has presented its difficulties. It would not be so bad if we still lived in town. Then walking to the store for groceries wouldn’t be so bad, but living some miles out of town makes it more complicated (about 20 minutes by car). We have been taking a lot more bodas (motorcycle taxis) and trying to bum rides from others. This is not really a complaint. Rather, this is just an update on the situation. We are still watching and waiting. Without a vehicle, life is a little more complicated but still very do able. The hard part is not knowing what the plan is. I would like to say we have always been very patient and never had any doubts, but I must admit, there are times I get frustrated and question how we are going about this. Should I be trying to find a way to fix the situation? Should I be working at raising money or trying to scrape up what we have to buy a cheap car? I know that sometimes God expects us to do the best with what we have. But ever since my first two attempts to fix the situation resulted in two clear “no” messages, I have felt that this is something God is going to deal with and we are to focus on being faithful in the midst of the situation and simply trust in Him. It is true that God has given us a couple of indications that He is working on this, but for the most part we cannot see much happening. One thing we have felt convicted on is being thankful not only in the midst of the difficulties but to learn to be thankful even for the difficulties. We still have some work in that area, and I must admit there are times I have some doubts. I don’t doubt that God will provide, for God has shown Himself faithful so many times; I know He is reliable. He will provide; it is just the how and the when we don’t know. Nor do we really need to know those things. My real question is the “what.” What am I supposed to do? Do I work at finding a solution for my family? Do I put out a plea to let people know about our situation? So far, it is only with a couple of close friends and in this blog that I have shared about it. Do I try to help matters along or do I just watch and wait? For now, I will watch and wait and keep asking God to make it clear what He would have me to do.

God's Got This!!!

I’m rather excited to see what God is going to do, and my hope is you will be encouraged, too! Let me give you a little background. Lately, I have been under a lot of stress. I won’t go into all the reasons. They aren’t life threatening and I know some of you face worse things, but I had allowed the pressure to get to me to the point that I was in continual physical pain. One of the problems was with our van. While we have been very thankful for our van, the roads here can be hard on vehicles. From the beginning, our van has had a tendency to overheat. We have had it worked on numerous times trying to fix the problem, but finally came to the realization that we would either have to replace the engine or replace the van. Replacing the engine can be risky here because you don’t really know what kind of engine you might get to replace it. We decided we would pray that God would provide some extra money at the end of the year so we could get a different vehicle. The van was getting worse, and we prayed it would make it till then. We made it to the end of the year and found that about four thousand dollars extra did come in for December. Praise God, and thank you so much to our supporters!!! With that, we thought we might have enough to get a cheaper vehicle. But we didn’t jump to buy one. We have learned that it is always better to seek God’s direction even if that means waiting a little. We didn’t have to wait long. Within 24 hours a different need arose that swallowed up all the extra money. It was clear the money was to go there because the extra money was almost exactly the amount needed. On the one hand, this was encouraging, for God not only knew what our needs would be, He had sent just the right amount! On the other hand, now what were we to do about the van? More stress. I decided I would take it to the mechanic and see what we could do to keep it running. There was no money for the work, but we would trust God to provide. This was on a Friday. The plan was to take the van to the mechanic on Monday. On Saturday the battery wouldn’t start the van. I had to jump the van to get to church on Sunday, and then jump it again to go home. Before we could make it home, the transmission started making noises and refusing to shift. As we pulled into our gate, the electronics on the dash went completely out. I had the feeling as if when I got out of the van and shut the door that the wheels would all fall off and the van would roll over on its side. What I felt was an urge to laugh and a sense of relief. It was clear that this was so much more than I could fix. Everything was more than I could fix, and I remembered that we had been here before. God had allowed us to be in these kinds of situations before. And either it was because there was some important lesson that we needed to learn, that, while it might not be pleasant, would in the end be for our good; or God was wanting to show Himself mighty, and was letting things get darker so His victory would be all the more clear. My attempt to try and fix things by my thinking had been answered with a resounding, “No!” Okay, I may be slow but I do eventually catch on. It was not up to me to fix this; God had a plan. I needed to surrender it to Him. That was not only true with the vehicle but all the rest as well. We have learned, when we get to this point, we don’t need to figure out the solution. We just need to focus on doing what we know to do, and trust God with the rest. We had planned to take the boys on the bus to go see Josh and Janae in Kenya. I really didn’t have the spare time or money to make this trip. It would have to be a quick one, lasting about 48 hours with over half of that being spent on the bus. But we knew it was important to go, so we decided not to think of the van and just go. Another thing we have learned is when you turn something over to God, you need to keep your eyes open to see what He might be doing so you can follow along. When we got to the school, we met up with a good missionary friend who told us he was feeling lead by God to offer to sell us his car. The car was much nicer than what we were looking for or even thought we could afford, but again, we have learned to rule out anything with God. So we asked him to pray about it and we would, too. He didn’t tell us how much he would ask for it, but in truth, it didn’t matter. We didn’t have any money for it. But more and more we felt that this was the car God intended for us to have, which meant God would have to be the One providing the money. I am not telling you this to try to make you feel sorry for us or to convince you to give money. The one thing God has made clear to me is that I am not to try to figure out a way to get the money. He already has a plan and I will just get in the way. I tell you this because I believe this is about much more than just our need. This is about God showing clearly how He can take care of those who trust in Him. That there is nothing He cannot deal with. Some of you need to hear this because you are facing situations that are beyond your ability to fix. I still don’t know how God is going to provide, but I believe He will and I write this in faith so you can see it from the impossible side before He steps in. I believe I will also be sharing sometime soon telling you how God has answered our prayers. This is a bit of a risk for if God doesn’t step in as I expect, I will look pretty foolish, but I have looked foolish for lesser things. So I invite you to stand with me to see the salvation of the Lord.

Christmas in Nairobi

When I had gone to Nairobi for my heart in November, the doctor required me to come back in one month’s time, just before Christmas. I did not really want to have to be traveling at that time but I was not really given a choice. So after we got home, we made arrangements for me to catch a night bus on the 21st of December, be in Nairobi for a couple days and get back home on the 24th. The time came for me to catch the bus which was to leave at 9 pm from Jinja, so we arrived a half hour early only to find out that the bus driver had just before we got there. (We later found out I was not the only one he had left behind; there were three others). The ticket agent, a young fellow named Omar (who was new to the job) used two cell phones simultaneously to try to get through to the bus driver or conductor to get them to pull over and wait for me. We three (including Michelle) jumped into our van and started after the bus. Now one of the reasons I take the bus rather than drive is because I don’t really enjoy driving on the African roads, especially at night. The roads are dark with lots of obstacles, including pot holes, animals, people, bikes, motorcycles, what not. Another fun thing is that many people use their high beams all the time and in effect, blind you. So off we race after the bus. I would have preferred to go slower but knowing that bus drivers are notorious for going very fast and that this fellow had already shown little inclination to wait even the required time, I figured if he did agree to wait for us, it wouldn’t be for long. Omar finally got through to the bus conductor who said they would wait for us at Iganga, a town about 45 minutes down the road. “ Why,” I asked, “couldn’t they pull over sooner?” But Omar had no answer. I later found out they were required to stop in Iganga and the driver wasn’t willing to stop earlier. After a rather nerve racking drive, we make it to Iganga only to find no bus. Omar gets back on the phones and is told that the bus driver had changed his mind and now required that we go on to the border, another hour and a half away, to get on the bus. Omar explained that some bus drivers prefer to have some empty seats so they can pick up riders on the way and pocket the money they get. Thus this driver was not very motivated to wait for me. At this point I do not want to go on. There was no guarantee that the driver would really wait for me at the border. Plus, going on would not only mean more night driving for me but it would also mean Michelle would need to travel back with our van over two hours late at night with a stranger. Now Omar seemed like a nice guy, but I did not want to trust Him with my wife. Michelle, however, assured me she would be fine. I knew this took a lot of courage on her part to say this. She obviously felt it was important I see the doctor. So, on we went. We only made it about ten minutes out of Iganga when the van over heated. Another reason I had chosen not to drive was because we were increasingly having problems with the van. We have taken the van to different mechanics, but having your vehicle worked on in Uganda is an adventure in itself, and despite repeated attempts the problems had not gone away. In fact, they had only grown worse and more frequent. So there we were sitting on the side of the road in the dark. At this point I was done. I wanted no more. I told Omar that we would wait for the van to cool, and then add more water (which we now carried all the time, along with extra oil). After that we would go back and I would go home. In truth, I was relieved no to have to leave my family and make the trip at Christmas time. I would see the doctor some other time. Omar was very polite and agreed to give us a refund, but he insisted he could get me on the next bus that left two hours after the one I was supposed to be on. Omar was working very hard on his two cell phones to make this work. At this point I didn’t want to go to Kenya even if he drove me in his own car (which of course he didn’t actually have); however, Michelle also seemed to think I should try to get on the second bus. I knew she was only concerned for my well being, but it felt like there was a conspiracy against me, trying to get me to do what I knew I should rather than what I wanted to do. I decided I would outsmart them. I agreed to take the later bus only if Omar could get me a seat up front like I had paid for on the first bus. Seats up front were more expensive because seats in the back tended to be uncomfortable and very bumpy. I knew that the buses at Christmas time were usually sold out, so I felt safe Omar would fail in getting me a front seat, but I would still look like as if I was being agreeable. I was still mentally patting myself on the back when we arrived back in Jinja. The second bus was just arriving. Omar went on and to my dismay managed to finagle to get me a seat towards the front. The ride to Nairobi was about typical - long with little sleep. When we got to Nairobi it was around 10 o’clock in the morning, and we were stuck in a traffic jam, which was also typical. The problem was since I was on a later bus I was now going to find it difficult to make my 11 o’clock appointment. After we spent some time watching us getting nowhere fast, I decided I would need to do something different. I told them to let me off the bus. I made it across traffic to some bodas (motorcycle taxis) I saw across the street. I jumped on and off we went weaving our way through the traffic making our way to the hospital across town. We made it to the hospital with a few minutes to spare, which I was very thankful for, for it gave me time for something that had become increasingly very important - finding a bathroom! Fortunately, I knew of one close to my doctor’s office. I got to the bathroom grabbed the handle to find it locked. Someone else is already in it. “Okay”, I thought, “I can wait a couple minutes.” I wait and I wait, shifting from one foot to the other. Finally the handle rattles. I think, “Great, he is coming out.” But the handle just continues to rattle. The guy is locked in the room and can’t get out. I quickly look around for someone to help. I see a guy with a name tag, which I hope means he works there, and try to explain to him that someone has locked themselves in the bathroom and can’t get out. It takes a few attempts to get the message through but eventually he agrees to go find someone who can let the guy out. I wait around for another couple minute but then decide I need to go find another bathroom. I walk up and down corridors but have no luck finding a bathroom. I decide by now the guy surely has gotten out so I go back to the corridor by my doctor’s office and find the guy is still locked inside and there is no one there helping him. I find another person, this time a gal who is a janitor and explain again the situation. She says she will go find someone to help. “Great,” I think, “I have heard this one before.” So I leave the guy to his own fate and go off once again looking for the golden throne. Finally I find an open bathroom, and there is great rejoicing. I never do find out what happened to the guy locked in the bathroom but I do make it to my appointment just in time. They take me right back to a room to check my vitals, including my blood pressure. The nurse tells me that my blood pressure looks a little high, and I think, “You have no idea!” The rest of the appointment goes fine. My blood pressure goes back down, and I am given an okay from the doctor. The next day has its own adventures, making my way around the city by bus, doing some last minute Christimas shopping, looking for things unavailable in Uganda. I catch the night bus back to Jinja and arrive a little before noon on Christmas Eve. It is not exactly the way I would have chosen to get into the Christmas spirit, but I am back with my family and once again thankful for the many ways our God has watched over and blessed us.

Grandma's Green Bean Casserole for Christmas

Hard to believe, but this is our fifth Christmas in Uganda. Some of our traditions we have been able to keep intact, but others had to go by the wayside. For instance, we still get new pajamas to wear on Christmas eve. While this has been a challenge, we have been able to continue this. The other thing that continues is fun filled Christmas stockings for whoever spends the night with us and of course reading the Christmas story before opening any gifts. One of the things that is difficult to replicate though? Food. Just things that seemed so simple in the states to get (ingredients) are either non-existent or difficult to find. For this reason, the green bean casserole that I always made from my grandma's recipe rarely graces our table for Christmas. But this year was different. A couple months ago, I was surprised to find canned water chestnuts of all things! I bought a can "just because I could" even though I had serious doubts that it would make any difference. The other ingredients would not be around. Then about a month ago, I was amazed to discover canned French-cut green beans in Jinja! I couldn't believe it!!! I bought three cans "just because I could." Then sat them on the shelf in the pantry. I would make them at Thanksgiving and use the chestnuts. I knew it still wouldn't taste right, but at least I could get "closer" to the original. Thanksgiving grew closer and it was apparent that we wouldn't even be around for that celebration because Bob and I needed to head to Nairobi Hospital to take care of his heart problem (atrial fibrillation). The green bean casserole would just have to wait. That wasn't very disappointing since I wouldn't have the other proper ingredients anyhow. After Bob's heart got fixed, we had to wait an extra day or so in order for the doctor to have a follow up appointment and confirm that his heart was going to stay in good rhythm before releasing us to go back to Uganda. What else is one to do while waiting in Nairobi? Hit the shopping mall, of course! At one of the supermarkets, I was super excited to discover Campbell's cream of mushroom soup! Campbell's for real!!! I bought two cans "just because I could!" I even found Nestle's chocolate chips and Skittles in four different flavors! I had to pinch myself to remind myself that I hadn't just tele-ported to America somehow ... When we got home to Uganda, I realized that I had almost all of the ingredients now that would make my grandma's green bean casserole! I only lacked French's French-fried onions! No problem. Andy and Karina Smith had asked many times if there was anything else I needed them to bring back ... and Dufur Christian Church had already purchased a footlocker which wasn't full yet just for us that the Smiths would be bringing the middle of December. I couldn't believe it. It was possible that if I just ordered some French-fried onions in time for the Smiths to stick them in our footlocker that we could actually have Grandma's Green Bean Casserole?!! Now you might think that green bean casserole is better than candy to me or, at the very least, it is my all-time favorite dish ever. I certainly seem to be consumed with figuring out how to have it! But, you know what? It really isn't. I enjoy it. I like it. I even miss it, at least at Thanksgiving and Christmas. When I find it at a potluck, I am excited to try it. But it never satisfies. It isn't the same recipe. Even if it was, the ingredients here don't quite taste the same. Last year I even tried cutting green beans (called French beans here) the French-style cut way and it took me an hour to do so. Then I made the recipe but to my disappointment. The mushroom soup I made just didn't taste "right." This year, I did make the correct recipe and it was good. I enjoyed it. But it really wasn't the green bean casserole that satisfied. It was the tradition of having Grandma's recipe on the table. It was like a taste of home, a way to be closer to family somehow. Being on the other side of the planet from family is hard at times and certainly the holidays are no exception. If nothing else though, it was a good reminder of what is truly important during the holidays. Green bean casserole or no, tradition or no, things cannot satisfy our hearts the way our precious Lord and Savior can. And no matter where in the world we are, He will always be with us! I can always, always take comfort in that!!!

Thanksgiving at Nairobi Hospital

It started after a morning of teaching. I sat down for some lunch and as I sat there, I could feel something unusual going on with my heart. I could feel it pounding in my chest. I checked my pulse and not only was it going faster than usual, it was also skipping beats. “Bummer”, I thought, “not again!” I had experienced heart arrhythmia four times before (actually, atrial fibrillation). Once it had gone back into rhythm on its own, the other times I had needed to be inverted (heart stopped and then started again with an electric shock). The heart didn’t seem to be skipping around as much this time as it had before. It just seemed to be skipping some beats. I thought, “Maybe if I just rest, it will calm down.” I knew it was probably wishful thinking, but last time had involved a month and a half of incapacity along with a memorable but highly unsatisfactory stay in a Ugandan hospital highlighted by an unsuccessful cardiovertion attempt, part of which I was concious for. All of this was followed by being life-flighted down to South Africa to be cardioverted again, this time successfully. So now you know where the “Bummer, not again,” comes from and why I was hoping things would correct themselves. But by morning it was clear that the heart was not going to fix itself. The pulse had slowed down to closer to normal but it was still skipping beats. I wasn’t feeling as bad as I had in the past but I knew I would need some help. I called my cardiologist who was in Nairobi. I had been followed by him ever since the last episode two years earlier. The receptionist would not let me talk to the doctor but told me I would need to make an appointment and come in. I tried to explain that I lived in a different country and it would take me hours of travel to get there. I wanted to know if there were something I should be doing now. She told me I need to make an appointment. So I made an appointment. The next day was earliest appointment I could get, which was just as well as it would take me that long to get there anyway. The choice was between flying and taking the bus. We had tried driving twice and our van had broken down both times, so driving was out. It is just not reliable for longhaul trips or anything with hills and mountains. The flight itself would only be about an hour and a half, but it would take at least four hours to get to the airport, then there would be standing in line getting tickets, going through security and customs and travel from the airport in Kenya. All-told it would take somewhere around nine hours of travel to fly with a lot of activity and stress. The bus would take about 12 hours but most of that I would just be sitting. Plus the bus would be ten times cheaper, so the bus it was. My wonderful wife lined up for our boys to stay at some friends and arranged for bus tickets on the night bus for us, along with a lot of last-minute details. Some Ugandan friends dropped us off at the bus station where we were told the bus would be there any minute. Our bus station consisted of two waiting room type chairs placed at the side of the road. We had a lot of stares at the two white people sitting at night by the side of the road in these nice chairs. We sat there for about an hour waiting for the bus, which was okay, until it started to rain. But eventually the bus did make it and we got going. My seat was fairly roomy and not too uncomfortable but Michelle was stuck by a fellow with a lot of bags that were stuck where her feet was supposed to be. The back of the seat in front of her kept bagging into her knees and her seat back was broke so if she leaned back on it, it would fall back into the lap of the fellow behind. Fortunately it was just a short bus ride, 12 hours or so. So off we went, bumping along. We were both able to get some sleep even if only intermittently. At first I hadn’t been feeling that bad, but by the time we were getting close to Nairobi, my chest was beginning to feel very tight and the pain was increasing. It was morning when we got off the bus in the middle of bustling Nairobi. Michelle grabbed the bags (Did I mention I had a wonderful wife) and we found a taxi. We went and got some food then to a guest house where we could get about an hour of rest before it was time for the doctor's appointment. The rest helped, so I was able to make it up the stairs to the doctor’s office by taking it slow. The doctor looked me over and told me sure enough I had a problem. He told me they could cardiovert me but first they would need to know there were no blood clots in my heart or it could kill me. He gave me two options. I could take some drugs and wait a month. Or they could do a procedure of putting some kind of scope down my throat to see if there were any clots and if not, go ahead and cardiovert me then. Last time, under the care of a doctor in Uganda, I had only had option A, and it had left me virtually bed ridden for more than a month, so this time I jumped at option B. The procedure was lined up for the next day, Thanksgiving. While we had been looking forward to spending Thanksgiving with friends, all the excitement had been put out of my mind. So the next morning as they were preparing me for the procedure (sliding a tube with a scope on it down my throat), I was surprised when the doctor wished me a “Happy Thanksgiving.” I thought, “This isn’t what I had envisioned putting down my throat on Thanksgiving, but oh well.” I was concious for the first part of them putting the tube down my throat (for some reason they needed me awake), but while I felt a little panicky at first it wasn’t too bad. And I don’t really remember much beyond feeling the start of it going down. I woke up in a different bed and was told that there had been no clots so they would now do the cardioversion. The doctor told me to count backwards from 100. I can remember getting to 28, and then I was waking up again and my heart was back to beating as before. A few hours later I was able to leave the hospital. During this time I was able to just rest, but Michelle was kept busy with a lot of running around. We had brought our credit card and debit card and had even called the credit card company in advance. But because of credit card fraud that had been going on in Kenya, they would not authorize the card. To get out of the hospital, we would have to pay our bill in full so Michelle was forced to find a way to get the money transferred from our bank in Uganda over to Kenya. Fortunately, a good friend back in Uganda was willing to give up part of his Thanksgiving to help us out. After a lot of stress and headache, Michelle was able to get it taken care of so I could leave the hospital. (Did I mention I have a wonderful wife?) We got out and stayed again at a guest house and were able the next day to catch a ride up to the school where Janae and Josh attended. As it turned out, they were just heading into Christmas break and were preparing to catch a bus ride back to Uganda the next morning. We were able to get a ride on the same bus. This bus ride took 15 hours but finally we were back home. Getting back to normal would still take about a week, but all-in-all, I was very thankful for so many things.

Where are these butterflies coming from?

A little over seventeen years ago now,I was pregnant with our firstborn, Janae. We were living in Virginia, a long ways from most of our family. I had no idea what having a baby would be like. I had much fear about the pain and just the entire delivery process. Not only did I want my mother to be near, but I especially desired my husband's presence. A few months before I was due (the first week of March), Bob was offered the free trip of a lifetime, a study trip to Israel by the local Eastern Star. Wow! How could he "not" go? Even though the trip meant he would be gone during the last weeks of my pregnancy and even over the expected due date ... how could he "not" go? After all, it was FREE!!! But my sweet husband, who dearly wanted to go to Israel on a trip such as this one, instead said, "No, when I go to Israel, we will go together." I was overwhelmed. From that time on, we have planned and saved some here and there for just such a trip. Tax refund money would go into a CD, so that we couldn't touch it without penalties. It is the only savings we have ever had that didn't get spent on something else. There was always a need. Our dream was that we would go together the year of our twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. With that anniversary approaching, last year we started wondering if our dream would come true. The giving income dropped all year long for our mission. It soon became evident that something had to change. What was it? Would we need to withdraw our Israel savings and instead live on it or use it for airfare to return to the states and end our time as missionaries in Uganda? What was God trying to tell us? To make a long story short, God increased our giving income so that we could remain in Uganda. He pointed us to join a new ministry here while staying involved with the old. We are excited about these changes. But that is another story. The point is that our Israel savings was left untouched. As we began to look for options of what tour group to join, it became evident that it was no coincidence that the very year we are to go on our dream vacation is also the very year that a friend from Oregon is leading a group there!!! There was no question in our minds that we would join that team! It is just days now before we leave on our dream trip. So why are butterflies entering my tummy? I am convinced that we are supposed to go. I have no doubt that God is wanting to bless us with this time together, learning more about Him and seeing where His Bible people lived and served. I am amazed at His awesome gift to us. Yet I will be a continent away from my children. A dear friend of the family will be with them. There is no reason to fear now. Is that the reason for the butterflies? Or is it that I am not physically fit like I once was when I was younger? After all, this trip requires moderate hiking from 6-8 miles a day being expected to walk/hike. I have been instructed very specifically about purchasing hiking boots and breaking them in. I have read carefully all the other directions on what to bring and what to leave behind. Bob and I have spent months now walking an hour every morning, five days a week, with an emphasis on including stairs in our routine. Living on a hilly terrain the last couple months surely has helped us. I am just about as physically ready as I could be (or so Bob tells me). So why the butterflies? Perhaps the butterflies are just coming from the excitement of the culmination of a dream come true when it doesn't yet feel like it is really happening. I truly don't know. But one thing I do know, God will be with me. God will be with the children. And God will go before us and prepare the way. I covet your prayers that He would accomplish exactly His desires in our hearts (for each of the 48 in our tour group - 14 from Oregon, I think it is) and that we would be changed forever by this dream trip, a once-in-a-lifetime experience to be sure!!!

Why Do I Ever Doubt?

This past Friday, I was once again confronted with the question, "Why do I ever doubt You, Lord?" You'd think that after so many years of walking with Him, knowing Him and experiencing the life that He has to offer with Him that I would never doubt His goodness and faithfulness to supply my every need. You'd think ... I know I have been silent on this blog now for literally a year, simply because I don't take the time to sit down and write. But I have been challenged lately that I should be. So ... at least for today, I am back at it. We are once again facing some huge changes in our lives. Last year (2013), our support base dropped by an average of $1,200 or so a month. Since we had a surplus that had been built up (because we need it for emergencies and for the expensive flights to the states on furlough, etc. this is important to have), we weren't too worried at first. But as the year went on, we continued to be behind and dipped into the reserves just in order to make it through the month. We went on furlough and this only compounded the problem. Some told us that it would change when we went on furlough and people would give more while we were home. While many did give, the situation only temporarily changed for one month. Then the dip returned. By October, the reserve was completely gone and we were barely able to draw out our basic salary. Money for ministry expenses had been nonexistent for a long time by then which means anything was paid for from our personal salary funds. To say the least, things have been more than tight. Any savings we had vanished quickly just for regular needs. Nothing for when the van breaks down or even regular maintenance, etc. But when October hit with our balance falling in the red, we discovered from the home office that unless we were within $500, we would not be sent our salary. This meant "no" money to live on! Wow. That was literal since no savings was left here in Uganda. We had to confront the problem straight on and honestly. We couldn't ignore the problem any longer or just wait for it to go away. Of course, this meant, we not only 'just prayed' about our situation to the Lord but we finally came to Him with completely open hearts, searching and asking what God has in mind for us. What did this mean for us? Did He want us to pack up and sell off our things, moving back to the states? Did He want us to change our lifestyle here somehow (we feel like we live frugally for Americans already but perhaps we could change even more, for instance)? Did He want us to go somewhere else to serve Him? What??? Send Bob back to the states just to fundraise? Many questions were suddenly asked as we sought His guidance with a new yearning and desire to know His will. Just about that time, one of our advisors from the home office "just happened" to be coming to Uganda. This meant we were able to sit down honestly and seek guidance face to face. His advice was to not only do the fundraising letter we had planned, explaining plainly our current situation, but to also ask some supporters to "friend raise" for us. We reluctantly complied but prayed and asked a number of folks if they would consider "friend raising" on our behalf. This meant asking and hosting friends in their home and directly asking them to consider supporting the Peterson family. We have never been "in your face" direct request type people, so this was uncomfortable for us to ask anyone else to do on our behalves. But we had prayed about it and believed we were supposed to follow this counsel. It definitely has worked for others and the documented statistics in terms of the rate of return and investment is much more successful than other methods. In short, those that responded to our requests said no and only one said no, but could they try something different that would be more appropriate for their situation. The latter was a fruitful one and one new supporting family resulted. Most likely, these efforts also brought forth much more prayer support. But what ensued after our fundraising efforts from a distance, feeble as they may have been, has truly been amazing to us! Literally, every week since then we have received word from someone that something is happening on our behalf. Either they have talked to their missions board chairman or their board is meeting next month and will decide if they will support us or even some new commitments have been made or a missions team is praying on our behalf (and didn't even receive one of our letters by that time), etc. God is so good! We are so grateful! During the month of December many gave sacrificially and added to our support account at the home office. We ended December with one of the highest giving months yet. It is not clear how many of those gifts were one time gifts and which ones will be ongoing monthly gifts. We won't really know that for sure for a number of months as we see what is consistently being given. But we were encouraged and continue to be encouraged. We are so grateful for everyone who has given and taken serious time to pray for our needs. God is obviously working for us! After much prayer, we do not believe God wants us to leave Uganda. Bob finishes writing the basic curriculum for pastor's training in the islands geared at the uneducated pastor next month. The first two year program ends in March and about a dozen men will graduate. The program will be offered again but deeper in the islands of Lake Victoria. It has been so exciting to be a part of instilling God's Word into the hearts of these pastors, some who had never even heard the story of creation before! God's Word will not return void and we are already seeing an impact on their personal lives as they live out His Word practically before their people. Changed lives always inspire changed lives! And it is only by Him that the fruit can be wrought! But ... what does God want from us? We were convinced the shift in finances meant He intended a change to be made of some sort. We had become quite comfortable in our three bedroom house with a large, private compound where the kids could play freely and safely without care. For the first time ever, our children have had their own yard which meant we could finally have family dogs without worry of someone else needing the yard at any given moment since it wasn't really ours. Our home was truly a sanctuary where we could escape even the culture around us, to a degree, when needed and just be "Americans." We could even share that with friends when they needed a break. Hospitality (not my gifting) had even become a ministry frequently enjoyed here. But change? To what and how? To be concise, we believe God wants us to join the staff at Alpha Omega Seminary, also a Global Outreach International ministry. Alpha Omega Seminary is located outside Jinja a few miles and has land that borders the Nile River. Men in ministry come from all over East Africa to obtain a three or four year degree, certified in America. Everything is done in English since they come with many different languages. The students come for five week intensive sessions at a time and return with homework for twelve weeks while they continue to minister at their churches and ministry sites. Bob will be academic dean and a professor. They have offered us housing rent-free which will save us $600 a month which is huge. We are excited about this new phase of our lives. But we are also experiencing some anxiety over what the changes mean. Our children will have to give up their family dogs because we cannot take them with us. No more private compound with our "own" sanctuary. We will be a "fish in a fish bowl" again as we live our lives before everyone, this time in a new culture. We lose quite a bit of our own space inside and outside since the house is considerably smaller than what we have now. But we know that since God is in this, we will benefit and gain so much more than it "appears" that we are losing! Change is just hard. One of the things that was giving me anxiety about the move is that the duplex we are moving into is actually a two bedroom duplex. All of the rooms are smaller and we are losing a fair amount of storage space as well. On the end wall, there was an addition of two rooms, bathrooms and a porch. This area was used/intended for visiting teachers to stay in. We were offered this space in addition to the main duplex since it was clear that two bedrooms would not be large enough to accommodate us and the school room space. I was so grateful for this, but it meant that two of my children would be living outside of our house. While I requested security bars and a security door to resolve my fears, I knew it would be so difficult for me to be comfortable and to sleep well at night. How could I ever know if they needed me in the middle of the night and if they were okay? I quickly thought of baby monitors or some kind of intercom system, etc. anything that would help me with this fear. I finally realized I just needed to trust God with what He has provided. (with Bob's help, of course) I couldn't say I had forgotten this fear, but I had chosen to put my trust fully in Him over it and stopped worrying so much about it. This past Friday, we received a phone call, "Could you come out today and discuss the house with us?" Oh, my ... what did that mean? I had already figured out "mostly" how things could fit and how it "might" could work, especially since they were giving us some space in the maintenance shed for storage. Now what? When we arrived, Jim Clair was in the house with a pad of paper, pencil and a sketch already drawn. It had come to him that morning! He could push out part of the wall, move some plumbing and create a hallway to adjoin the two living spaces; thereby creating one four bedroom house on that end of the duplex!!! I was overwhelmed. Truly amazed. Once again, God was providing for ALL of our needs. Not just "some," but ALL. A mother's heart requires a knowledge that her children are safe and well cared for. Even this, He cared for. He knew that He could care for them without a remodel, that they could be safe because He is in charge and they are in His loving care. But He cared enough to give Jim this incredible plan which meets even the deeper emotional need of a mother. My need. I had surrendered it and He had given back beyond what I imagined. Now I know that it is going to take quite a bit of money to make this remodel happen. But I believe this is God's plan and even that He will provide. We have heard His call to Alpha Omega Seminary and answered, "Yes, Lord. We will go." And He? He is ever so faithful to reward us in even such things as a momma's heart. So I ask, "Why do I ever doubt You, my Lord?" And perhaps, just perhaps, next time I won't!